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Non-Verbal Communication: Let’s Focus on Eye Contact
By Administration | September 28, 2007
This article should be a shorter one as I’m going to get straight to the point: eye contact. What is it, what does it mean, and how can you make it more effective?
What I mean when I refer to eye contact:
When I say eye contact I don’t necessarily mean a long, definitive gaze into the other party’s eyes. That can eventually become annoying and probably a little creepy. What I’m referring to is a direct glance that establishes your focus.
What Eye Contact Means to Another Person:
The best way to illistrate this point is by a demonstration. Walk up to someone working intently on their computer and talk to them. If they deviate from their work and turn to face you the chances are good that they will actually focus on the conversation with the intent of taking something significant away from it.
However, if they talk to you over their shoulder (talk to the computer screen) the chances are good that you will find yourself repeating a lot of what you are saying. I bet that right now you’re getting a flashback to a situation that is exactly what I’ve just described.
So what’s the connection between eye contact and meaningful communication? Intent. If you are talking to me and I’m focused on my computer screen I’m much less likely to give the conversation between you and I priority over what I’m currently looking at on my screen. It’s not a personal reason but rather a psychological one.
However, it is in your best interest to master the art of eye contact. Numerous studies have shown that maintaining eye contact in a one on one or group setting establishes a mutual aura of respect and equality. Basically, it keeps the communicative doors open.
How Maintaining Eye Contact Can and Will Benefit You:
In a sales position it is imperative that the sales agent maintain the dominant role. The most effective method of doing so is by portraying confidense. And, as you’re probably thinking, eye contact is one of the most effective ways to do that.
In a sales position whoever is in control of the sale will usually establish eye contact while the more submissive party will avoid it. The same can be said of every argument and confrontation you’ve ever been in. Eye contact is empowering, and because of the natural communicative signals that it sends to the other parties, maintaining it facilitates effective communicaiton.
Studies have shown that maintaining eye contact can effectively reduce tension in a conversation, show an image of assertion, and conveys respect. Though, by the same means, too much eye contact can portray aggression, hostility, and even anger. The “death stare” can infuriate someone without you having to mutter a single word.
Take some time to commit to teaching yourself to use eye contact naturally. When you’re talking to someone quickly glance at their eyes and notice their level of committment to the conversation.
Over time maintaining eye contact will become natural and you will notice a difference in your conversations.
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